As the New Year is unfolding, I’ve been thinking about how grateful I am to have a relationship with God, and how grateful I am to be in this wheelchair. Nothing about my former way of life is appealing to me. I put together this comparison of what it was like then and what it’s like now. Read the rest of this entry
Tag Archives: Disability
I wrote this essay to be included and a friend’s book.
I became a Christian in 1989 when I was 25 years old. I had never read the Bible and had no idea I could have a personal, life-changing relationship with God. Prior to my conversion, I had been an alcoholic for 10 years. I started drinking when I was 15, and by high school, I was drinking in the mornings. I remember I was always desperate for the drink. It’s all I ever thought about and the only thing I craved. My life was miserable. I felt so alone, so lost and so hopeless. I just assumed my life would always be that dismal. I knew something was missing. Read the rest of this entry
Today I have hope because I am focusing on the right things. But my trek to this point has been hard.
As many of you know, I’ve had a rough several months. I’ve been in and out of the ICU, spent time in a long term acute care facility, and, for a while, was not able to return to the facility that has been my home for five years. That was probably the worst part of this journey. The good news is, I’ve returned to my facility, where much of the staff is like family to me, and I’m close to my church folk and many loyal friends who visit me on a regular basis. Read the rest of this entry
It’s been a long month. I’ve spent more than 4 weeks in a hospital setting, and many days laying in the ICU. As a quadriplegic, I am unable to move in the bed or get up and walk around, so lying completely still for days and days causes a lot of anxiety and depression. I feel like I want to jump out of my skin because I get so crazy. I was finally transferred out of the hospital but into another long-term acute care facility (LTAC). An LTAC is basically a step down hospital for people who are too sick to return home or back to a facility, but can’t stay in a real hospital. Read the rest of this entry
I have been feeling so down the past week or so and I can’t pinpoint why. I feel more sad than usual when I look around this facility and see people who are confused, lost, or feel left behind by their family and friends. I can tell there is something bothering me but I’m not sure what it is, so I’ve been praying about it and asking God to reveal it to me. Read the rest of this entry
Lately I’ve been thinking about all I have to be grateful for, even as I sit in this wheelchair. When I think about what my life was like before this injury occurred, I am even more thankful for my current circumstances. This paralysis has given me a chance to finally live authentically, a chance to have a truly meaningful relationship with God, and an opportunity to have deep and abiding relationships with others. Read the rest of this entry
As I was being placed in my wheelchair this morning, one dominant thought crossed my mind: I am not in the mood for this day. I barely got any sleep over the past couple nights because my roommate kept waking up and calling out for help. This morning when I got bathed it was chilly in my room so my body felt even chillier. I hate a cold bath. I have chronic pain in my neck and shoulder, but today it feels like the pain has been turned up a few notches.