For the last several weeks I have been struggling to sleep, once again. I might go five or six days in a row sleeping only one to three hours per night. On top of that, in November I was hospitalized twice at Duke. I first went for a septic UTI, which kept me there almost a week. Then a week later, I had to go back for a blood infection which also kept me there for about a week. This caused me to miss an entire week of my class which really put me behind.Read the rest of this entry
Tag Archives: Disability
During my prayer time last night, I found myself shaking my fist at God in frustration. Thankfully He didn’t strike me with lightning because He is merciful and full of lovingkindness. Plus, it motivated me to write this blog. I am open to the idea that what I’m about to tell you was part of His plan for me. It’s possible He allowed me to go through the events I’m going to share to help me grow and become more holy. And to think it all started with the failure of permanent eyeliner.Read the rest of this entry
For many of you that read my blog, you know that I am paralyzed from the shoulders down and live in a long-term care facility. My permanent aide of the last five years has picked up different responsibilities so others are having to fill in. There has been very little consistency in the aides that are now taking care of me over the three shifts that have to be covered. It’s difficult to have someone different every day see me in ways that make me feel super vulnerable.
These changes in my caregiving routine have caused me a lot of insecurity and anxiety. These feelings are amplified during my nightly battle with insomnia and have caused me to experience a wicked depression. Some mornings I feel like I just can’t breathe and it’s difficult to focus on doing the right things.Read the rest of this entry