Since my injury occurred a year and a half ago, I’ve developed fears which have resulted in deep-seated anxiety. I fear that as a disabled person I’m an easy target to be taken advantage of. I currently have a dispute with my last facility about overbilling. Unfortunately, I can’t walk through their doors in a power suit, armed with paperwork, and give them a piece of my mind. So instead I get worked up and frustrated to the point that I can’t think straight, all the while laying awake at night.
I also fear going to sleep at night. I’m afraid something will happen to me while I’m sleeping and I won’t know that it’s happening. It may sound outrageous to some but it feels like a real possibility to me. I’ve laid awake entire nights worrying and watching my door.
All of this anxiety boils down to two things: lack of power and lack of control. I truly have no physical power as a paralyzed person, but I do have the full armor of God which doesn’t require strong arms, legs, and hands to put on; it only requires control of a few simple things.
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. – Ephesians 6:10
I first have to recognize who really has the power. This Scripture teaches me that God has mighty power. The devil wants to use these anxiety–producing thoughts to make me lose my faith in the mighty power of God.
Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. – Ephesians 6:14 – 17
The Belt Of Truth – the Bible says in Proverbs 3:5 that I can trust God with all of my heart (and with all of my situations) and he will make my paths straight. It doesn’t say the paths will be smooth and easy, but God will lead me straight to him. The Bible also says in 1 Peter 5:7 that I can cast my anxieties on God because he cares for me.
The Breastplate of Righteousness – righteousness is what I strive for every day. I’m not perfect but it’s my goal.
The Shield of Faith – do I believe in a powerful God that is sovereign, loving, and protecting? Yes! This faith is what extinguishes the flaming arrows/negative thoughts. I sometimes recite Scriptures out loud to reinforce my shield (probably to the chagrin of my neighbors).
The Helmet of Salvation and Sword of the Spirit – which is the word of God. I stay in the word of God every day as much as possible. Even when I was able-bodied and didn’t make time the way I should have, I read at least one Scripture to hold in my heart.
God’s armor is not heavy. It actually makes the world much lighter. I’m thankful that God has a plan for all situations and his directions for steering clear of the evil one are concrete.
NOTE TO READERS: I also understand that sometimes counseling and medical advice is needed. I thank God for that as well.
Diary of a Quadriplegic 
Thank you for today’s ‘lesson’.
I hope this will made into a little book I can keep.
Love doreen
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Thank you for the courage to write of your anxious times and fears. It is a blessing to read your writings, as well as an encouragement. We know our God is able :
“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”(Ephesians 3:20-21 ESV)
Our Lord Jesus is your Strength. He will continue to guide you in all ways. Be prepared for your involvement in powerful ministry to many. Keep your heart and mind focussed on JESUS CHRIST, and what He is able to do through you,
Praying for you. If there are specifics you care to share, please feel free. Jesus hears all.
God’s Blessings.
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Thank you for being real with your readers. I will be praying for you. I look forward to hearing more of God’s faithfulness to you. Have you been able to be encouraged by any others that might have paved the way in similar circumstances? Joni and joniandfriends.org? If you haven’t checkout out that ministry yet, I think it would bless you. I pray you can connect with others that greatly encourage you in Christ. Praying for you!
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Terri, I am so thankful you found my blog site. You may not believe this, but your testimony is of great importance for the Kingdom of God. Hang in there. You have a new friend, follower, and a true believer in the power of God.
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Terri that was so moving, and I don’t just mean emotionally. I mean it “moved” me – to turn over my own worries, troubles, and fears to God because no matter how big or small we all have them. Our downfall is when we think we can handle them on our own and your devotion today was such a reminder and testimony of that.
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Thank you, Terri, for helping to start my day grounded in TRUTH, not emotions and the enemy’s lies.
Truly God uses the weak to shame the strong. Just like the cross of Jesus!
Love you❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Terri, thank you for openly sharing your fears. Many people who do not have the limitations you do also struggle with fear. Fear is real but you are on the right path to overcome your fears. Remember that God knows your struggles and He is will you. If I wake up in the middle of the night, I will pray for you in a special way.
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Hi, Terri,
I just logged onto your blog for the first time today and was immediately touched and inspired. Because of your circumstances, your words have the power to speak to people in a very profound way. I am very grateful that you are willing to share your thoughts, struggles, and spiritual growth and insights to help build up others. You are often in my prayers and now I will be able to be more in tune with where you are. Love in Christ Jesus,
Vicki Sandiford
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Terri,
I’m so sorry that on top of everything else you’re dealing with, you’re suffering with these tormenting fears. I’m praying that you would find physical and emotional rest – Bill
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Terri, I really am finding that the greatest battle is over our hearts and mind. It is something I felt compelled to write about today after reading Joshua this morning. May our good God bless your inner man with strength through His Spirit!
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Praying for you, precious lady. May you find peace and rest in Him. Helen
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Hi Terry, Steve here. Thought I would give you something to ponder on, The Thorn in the Flesh
And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:7-10). You are strong.
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